Funk Shmunk!!

It was so nice escaping to North Carolina last month, but for whatever reason reality hit me hard when I returned. You could say I'm recovering from being in a "funk." I'm attributing my "funk" to a combination of the following... the upward trend in my tumor marker, my D Day anniversary (the day I was diagnosed), along with the passing of a friend who was battling cancer herself. My friend EA said it best and I'd like to share it w/ y'all... God got another angel. Rest in peace Natalie. May God hold you tightly in His arms as you are now free of pain and suffering. Many prayers for Natalie's husband Bill, her family and all her friends who loved her.

You know, it's hard to express how I've been feeling over the last couple of weeks. And yes, that means I haven't been returning phone calls and emails... sorry about that. I'm frustrated, aggravated and just flat out pissed off. It's not fair! Who do you know that has fought cancer? You? A family member? Friend? Coworker? It's amazing how many lives are affected by cancer in some way or another. It's just not fair! It's scary, depressing and flat out unfair! Did I mention it's unfair?!?  I'm sure I'll continue to go through my "funks" at one point in time or another, but right now I'm trying so hard to muster up any and all strength I have to fight this disease and get it under control! After this last weekend of getting good news from my PET, celebrating my 9th anniversary w/ my hubby and spending some time w/ girlfriends... I'm FINALLY playing catch up on, well, just about everything.

It's time for me to kick this so-called "funk" and get back into the mind set of kickin' this cancer! So I know you have been anxiously awaiting my PET results...believe me, you're not the only one!! My PET scan came back showing an overall improvement... liver, bones, the whole she-bang (and no, I'm not going to break out into a William Hung song). Anyway, I don't think it was as big of an improvement as my Doctor was hoping for and that's why we decided to proceed w/ the trial drug at the START clinic in San Antonio. To use in a baseball analogy (sorry, no peanuts and cracker jacks in this analogy), we basically hit a double w/ the treatment that I'm currently on, but what we're really wanting is a home run... and we think this trial might be that home run. What I'm really excited about is the trial requires regular scans and images (that they take care of) to monitor my progress... where as now I have to wait on my insurance to approve those scans and images. That of course means a lot of waiting and lets not forget to mention the anticipation of the tumor marker that's "supposed" to be a guide. I gotta say, I'm not having a lot of faith in the tumor marker these days considering the upward trend over the last couple of weeks. Just sayin'! We're still not quite sure what that was all about... maybe my body is still in shock from the anti-estrogen drugs. Regardless, the PET showed improvement... I'll take it!

So the plan is to start the trial in S.A. either the first or second week in November. Until then I've stopped taking all the oral drugs I've been prescribed in order to "detox" which apparently takes 3 - 4 weeks. The only drug the trial said I could continue taking is the Zometa infusion for my bone mets. So I'll keep you posted... the nerves are already kickin' in w/ the thought of the new treatment and adding the travel aspect into the plan. But we'll make it work! If this trial drug is the "miracle drug" everyone is talking about... I'm ready for that home run!! Bring it on!!!